Thursday, February 23, 2023

The Jesus and the Nicodemus in us all!

I recently shared a devotion at a staff meeting titled, Nicodemus and the Truth, from the book titled The Book of Awakening by Mark Nepo.  The point of the devotion was that there is a Nicodemus and a Jesus in all of us.  Nicodemus was a Pharisee who secretly believed in Jesus.  He would meet with Jesus in secret at night, but would never acknowledge his association with Jesus during the day.  (John 3:1-21)

“This story shows us the quiet pain that comes from not honoring what we know to be true, even if all we know to be true are the questions we are asking.  It is even more useful to realize that we each carry a Jesus and a Nicodemus within us; that is, we each have a divine inner voice that opens us to the truth and a mediating social voice that is reluctant to show its truth to others.” (pg. 62 The Book of Awakening)

There are definitely times when I give into the Nicodemus in me.  These are moments when I shy away from telling the truth.  These are moments that it is easier to stick with the “old ways” out of habit or fear even when I know things have changed.  These are times when I have heard the divine inner voice in secret, but deny it in public.    

“But this moment of inner embarrassment, when we catch ourselves in the act of split living, is also the recurring chance for us to honor once again what we know to be true.  For anyone, no matter how wounded or distressed, can in a moment of truth let the God within show itself out here in the world.  However small or fleeting, this one repeatable act can restore our common and vital sense of being alive.” (pg. 62 The Book of Awakening

As I reflex on this devotion, I am reminded to listen to and act on the inner divine voice of Jesus.  And when I fail, I will try to give myself grace and comfort the Nicodemus in me that it is safe to honor what it knows in the light of day.  I thank God for the continued inner divine voice that does not give up even when the inner Nicodemus seems to win.   

Peace, Pastor Katrina Steingraeber   


  

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