The Jesus and the Nicodemus in us all!

I recently shared a devotion at a staff meeting titled, Nicodemus and the Truth, from the book titled The Book of Awakening by Mark Nepo.  The point of the devotion was that there is a Nicodemus and a Jesus in all of us.  Nicodemus was a Pharisee who secretly believed in Jesus.  He would meet with Jesus in secret at night, but would never acknowledge his association with Jesus during the day.  (John 3:1-21)

“This story shows us the quiet pain that comes from not honoring what we know to be true, even if all we know to be true are the questions we are asking.  It is even more useful to realize that we each carry a Jesus and a Nicodemus within us; that is, we each have a divine inner voice that opens us to the truth and a mediating social voice that is reluctant to show its truth to others.” (pg. 62 The Book of Awakening)

There are definitely times when I give into the Nicodemus in me.  These are moments when I shy away from telling the truth.  These are moments that it is easier to stick with the “old ways” out of habit or fear even when I know things have changed.  These are times when I have heard the divine inner voice in secret, but deny it in public.    

“But this moment of inner embarrassment, when we catch ourselves in the act of split living, is also the recurring chance for us to honor once again what we know to be true.  For anyone, no matter how wounded or distressed, can in a moment of truth let the God within show itself out here in the world.  However small or fleeting, this one repeatable act can restore our common and vital sense of being alive.” (pg. 62 The Book of Awakening) 

As I reflex on this devotion, I am reminded to listen to and act on the inner divine voice of Jesus.  And when I fail, I will try to give myself grace and comfort the Nicodemus in me that it is safe to honor what it knows in the light of day.  I thank God for the continued inner divine voice that does not give up even when the inner Nicodemus seems to win.   

Peace, Pastor Katrina Steingraeber   

  

Looking Back on 2022

Over the last few weeks, folks have been reading through the St. Mark Annual Report for 2022. It is always amazing to look back on a year and discover just how full it was. If you haven’t done so yet, I pray you are able to read through this packet to see for yourself all that this past year had to offer. Copies are available at church, as well as at this link. One of the many reports in that packet is my own, which you can read below.

Though it wasn’t what I initially planned, my sabbatical was exactly what I needed. My family stayed home, welcomed our daughter Rowan, and found our footing as a family of four. I was able to read and reflect on ecology in the church as I visited all 38 developed forest preserves in Winnebago county. Applying those reflections to our life together is an ongoing process which I hope will one day result in exciting developments to our east lawn, along with vibrant ministries for our neighborhood. I am beyond grateful to the staff, the council, and especially Pastor Katrina for continuing their work while also covering all of my duties while I was away. 

Our journey with Covid continues, yet this year saw us lift the last of our lingering restrictions and protocols. I do not know what the future holds, but I am grateful to be on the other side of perhaps the most difficult era of history most of us have ever witnessed. Your openness to new things and your generosity through it all are such a tremendous blessing. 

Worship was wonderful this year. The season of Lent saw the arrival of new purple paraments, commissioned by our Altar Guild, funded by memorial gifts, and created by liturgical artist, Anne Anderson, of Forest City, Iowa. Wednesdays during that season were brightened by Holden Evening Prayer candlelight services. For the first time, we had a service on the Saturday before Easter. It was interactive, meaningful, and full of life. Outdoor worship returned in May— not because it was necessary, but rather because so many yearned to be under the canopy of creation for worship. Somewhat ironically, our original outdoor tent service was rained out in September, but the sense of community and joy we had in that crowded Fellowship Hall was a silver lining on that stormy day. 

I cannot say enough good things about our staff. We are truly blessed to have this group of folks doing the daily work of St. Mark, caring for our members, and assisting one another in all our various roles. In January we said goodbye to Chris Semmelroth, our property manager of two years, and we have been fortunate to have Randy Scott serving in an interim role since May. Melinda Alekna, our youth director for 21 years, retired in October. Melinda shaped the lives of so many throughout her time, and though she left big shoes to fill we are actively searching for someone who can pick up where she left off. 

While funerals are always difficult, this was a particularly hard year. Since our last annual meeting, I presided over nine memorial services. That is an especially large number, considering I was away on sabbatical for three months. It was hard on a lot of us; we lost many long-time members who were active in the life of this place right up to the end. Just like you, I need to be reminded of the hope we have in resurrection each and every day. 

Hope is a driving force. More than mere optimism or wishful thinking, hope stirs us to action and guides us through difficult times. We have relied on hope the last few years, and we will need it all the more in the year to come. It can be easy to lose hope when facing things like budget shortfalls, loss of members, and a changing world. My hope is that in 2023 we will discover new ways to contribute our time and our gifts, new ways to use what God has given us, and new ways to share God’s love with our community. As we look back, may we be inspired for our future together. 

Peace,

Pastor Chad McKenna